Spring is here! We just had the first day of Spring not too long ago and that makes me feel just awesome. This year the first day of Spring happens to fall right after the Solar Eclipse we had last week or so and right before the Lunar Eclipse we're going to have on the 23rd. There are a lot of things going on this month and Astrologically speaking I gather it's supposed to be a real time of self realization and true discovery of where we want to be in life, coupled with feelings of solidarity, realism and practicality of the Universe.
For me it's been like someone giving me binoculars or a radio transmitter or something - I can see and feel things on a wider spectrum (and see all the amazing opportunities life has to offer), but at the same time I'm still in my room and nothing spectacular has actually "taken place" - understanding there are some real things that can't be avoided, such as financial status, career choices, family issues, has been driving me crazy. It's supposed to be a big time for all of us, but you're going to hear all about me for now.
Personally the last week or so has been quite nerve-racking and frustrating. I simply can't stand the feeling of "hurry up and wait", being "stuck" and lacking "control." Some of this I'm sure is related to an "Arien" point of view - so bear with me while I break it down. This week has been about realizing, seeing and fully understanding where I want to be - and then comparing that scenario to the cruddy personal circumstances I have going on presently. For me it's like torture, purgatory... just the worst. Every little crumb of negativity gets amplified and it's like nails on a chalkboard. Keep in mind - things being amplified lately is only part of the current Astrological trends going on - but nevertheless it still makes me want to die.
Lately it's been like, one moment: I get these really hyped up ideas and I feel great, amazing, loving, visual, intense, creative, secure, flawless, all knowing, active, I'm on top of the world, everyone loves me! - and then the next moment: I get slapped in the face with all these harsh realities - My living space is too small, my job is going nowhere, my ex is running the show, I'm a lousy parent, I wish I could be more like normal people, I have issues that no one will ever understand, blah blah blah.. It's all been quite disruptive and my thoughts become all consuming, and because I can't let things go you know what happens?
I get sick. The God / Universe says, "well TJ you bastard you can't calm yourself down so here's a nice buttery virus to help put things into perspective for you." You can't avoid the Judiciary acts of the Universe I guess. - and I paid for it.
Only just tonight (3/21) have I finally caught a glimpse of an honest to goodness supportive quality in the midst of all this intensity. I'm getting over this crappy virus, I'm riding high on endorphins and jiggly legs from the gym, it seems my living situation has a little light at the end of the tunnel now... and I have tomorrow off to relax and align my energy. Thank God.
I will try to squeeze something good out of this - and that is if there is anyone else out there who has felt any of the "powerless" vibe of the Universe lately, or felt like they were being swept away by circumstance, - or found themselves being a slave to monotony and unsatisfying drudgery - just know - You're not alone! They say misery loves company, and believe me I've been feeling it full force. It's been so bad on some days that I just want to drive away and start all over again. A feeling some of you may have had before as well.
That being said - I believe this time of intense self realization is on it's way OUT and the craziness of it all will soon be coming to an end. It won't end on a negative note, however. (and this is how awesome the Universe is -) We will be receiving a FULL MOON to end our path of self discovery. It's like God's way of saying - "So - What are you gonna do about it?"
It's up to us to take our findings, understand what they mean to us, and figure out a way to bring the change we want into our lives. To put all this into very simple terms - This is our time to plant the seeds of what we wish to create. We've seen everything, felt everything, and have a pretty good understanding of where we want to be and what we want to attract in our lives. Some of us had to deal with a little more than others during this phase, and that's ok - some of us are just a little more full tilt. but that's awesome. "god gives the toughest jobs to the toughest people."
The good news is - by the 23rd - when the Full moon shines and fills our reality up, the planting will be done and growth is going to start. Let's make sure we plant the right seeds.
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So my last entry might of come off as a little whiney - poor me - look at me - kinda vibe - and rightfully so - I was feeling kind of icky and down in the dumps for various reasons. I get selfish and a very bad case of tunnel vision when things are bad for me... But... TODAY has been much different. I'm considering myself finally OVER whatever virus I had - my search for new living quarters is looking QUITE good now - and things in general just seem to be going my way. I'd like to take a minute to acknowledge this and reflect on this concept of give and take, yin and tang, up and down...
There is a natural attraction of opposites in terms of how the Universe works - it's kind of interesting really... As humans we go through life wanting and striving and hoping for nothing but good things, feeling good, getting good results, only having good positive experiences - BUT inevitably we are faced with some occasional set backs, second thoughts, cold harsh reality, rainy days, injury / sickness, and it just downright blows for a while at times. The trick and truly hard feat as I have come to realize lately - is learning to understand and try to enjoy our times of negativity and unhappiness.
If we broaden our perception we find that there are legit reasons for the negativity we go through in our lives. In essence - There can never truly be an ultimate awesomeness without there being an ultimate shittiness somewhere - it's just the way things perpetuate themselves. I guess it's kind of like a battery - there is a negative and a positive side - both sides of the spectrum are needed to create POWER. - So thank you, life, for giving me a few cruddy days lately. Purgatory or "the cold hard look in the mirror" or whatever you want to call it. All so that the good things to come seem truly good. Or summed up by A. Crowley, "That which I came to destroy, in order that I might fulfill."
So - In the spirit of the Full moon tomorrow - planting seeds - and starting this Spring with our best foot forward - Allow me to wish you the very best success in your life and in all your endeavors. Have you taken the time to look at your life? Do you know what you want? Take an inventory and get those seeds ready because Planting time is NOW.
(Esoteric Tie in)
Notice a theme lately? It's funny because I never fully understood this time of year until I started studying occultism - but it makes so much sense when you think about it. We can't have growth without fertilizer, we can't see anything new unless we take our eyes off something old, the
Winter has to die before the Spring can come to life. We need to have bad days in order to appreciate the good ones - In Easter terms: JC has to die and there HAS to be a period of hopelessness, despair and uncertainty before there can be a time of resurrection, rejoicing and celebration.
So in closing - Happy Easter and I hope I have given you something to think about in the days to come. Life ebbs and flows. If you ever find yourself in a negative mood or situation, know that it's not going to last forever and something awesome is probably right around the corner.
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I know I said I would write about some of the Fitness ideas / concepts I've seen in the media lately but truth be told I just haven't been able to watch a lot of TV this last week. Although I can't write about anything too current, I will touch on a few of the shows I've seen and give you my thoughts on them.
Broken Skull Ranch:
This is the one where that Steve Austin guy gets athletes together so they can compete in some majorly intense / competitive type courses.. At the end someone wins and takes home some money and prizes or whatever. I've only seen bits and pieces but it seems like a pretty basic show to me. There's action and you get to see different people from different fitness backgrounds and the obstacles look pretty intense. Fun to watch and entertaining. I just wish they would jazz it up a little bit though - throw in some crocodiles or a snake pit u know?
American Ninja Warrior:
What can I say about this that hasn't already been said? To me this is like THE show that put physical enhancement in the spotlight. It's kind of got that Olympic feel to it - the best people from all different backgrounds are competing, you get a little history about them, etc. What is noteworthy to me is that it really exemplifies the idea that the human body can be amazing and do amazing things - and it's not just all about being able to play baseball, or basketball, or being a good quarterback, etc. Seldom do I see the idea of physical fitness being celebrated without it being attached to something mainstream... thank you for introducing the Ninja vibe to it too. Who doesn't love ninjas?
From Fit to Fat to Fit:
Woaaah nelly lol this is ummm... thinking outside the box? I don't even know WHAT to think about this one... I have only seen commercials for it and a few bits and pieces of it at the Nursing Home but it seems like the trainer deliberately flushes their life down the toilet for a period of time, puts on 15-20 lbs or whatever, so that their client can feel good about working out. The client gets to have a buddy going through the same things basically. In essence it seems like a shock factor cheap sell to me that won't last long... but who knows. First of all - personally - just as a human being, I would NEVER ask someone to alter their physical appearance just for me NOR would I feel like that is even necessary... I don't get it - like I don't even understand how the idea even enters the equation... UNLESS - the athlete is doing it for themselves, like as a weird inner journey / psychological experiment or something. "What else is there ? What kind of boundaries can I push?" kind of thing... Ohh boy. It seems to be a hit at the Nursing Home, so maybe there is hope. aaaand I have never seen a full episode so I suppose I can't judge a book by it's cover. but from where I sit right now - it looks a little too icky... not my cup of tea.
Dwayne Johnson's - Wake Up Call:
THIS was my absolute favorite take on the whole fitness / proactive lifestyle getting put into TV show format. It was short lived and only had like one or two episodes but it hits a home run and ranks high on my list. First of all I love this guy. It's like an all around good guy, embracing positivity, change, doing the right thing. He always plays the HERO archetype, good hearted, respectful. Really I mean he's just a total smiley douche bag, lol but idk, I always had love for this guy.
Anyway the show featured the rock going from place to place, helping down and out people. People in the show were in really bad circumstances. Facing problems like addiction, poverty, racism, - relationship issues, family drama things like that. and the rock would help them. With whatever powers the rock has (and of course some physical fitness stuff) He would help people graduate school, get over their sad issues, get a job, find themselves, whatever else. I thought that was just lovely.
It's not hard to see WHY the show got cancelled... I mean it's not exactly entertaining and there's no real reason to tune in week after week. There was no real premise besides just the idea of helping people become better versions of themselves - but that in my eyes is worth of watching. Good for you Rock! I knew what you were going for... or as you might say - " I could smell what you were cooking!" hahahaha lol
Sorry to see you go. It would be nice to see a comeback.
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Thanks for reading, guys. Stay safe and good luck with all the positive changes you want to make in YOUR life.
Until next time -
<3
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