Holidays, Esoteric Entry (Psychic Self Defense) , Life on the Turn Up...

       So it's that time again, guys. Thanksgiving has passed and Christmas is sneaking up on us as each minute passes. Stress may be starting to set in, thoughts of our personal finances become magnified, another year has gone by and you feel like you're getting older. Maybe you feel like you didn't get to do all the things you wanted or achieve all the goals you had in mind this year, and all the while everywhere you look you're getting hit in the face with one singular idea: BUY OUR STUFF

      All the sweetest video games and systems come out right before Christmas, Black Friday deals lure us in, spend so much and get x free, free layaway, no interest for 10 months, guaranteed money back, free trial offer, "show that special someone you love them" (by giving them "this"). You know what I'm getting at here.

     One thing that personally gets me down is when I see the holiday commercial where a guy surprises his wife or GF with a box of diamonds... or a brand new car... or a two week vacation to Hawaii.... Fuuuuck me - If that just doesn't just put things into perspective for most of us. lol...  I know this sounds a bit like Scrooge, but hear me out on this.

       It's very easy around the Holidays to get sucked into stress and negative thinking, but I believe that can be avoided by practicing gratitude and finding a way to do something good for someone less fortunate. You gotta give it away to keep it - u feel me?

      So during this Holiday season I would like to ask my readers to take a little time, give a little bit of their thought power and energy to their own personal gratitude, and how they can make the world a better place. (it doesn't have to be financial!)

     During the midst of all this craziness (which CAN be enjoyable don't get me wrong) as you grow as a person and experience this new Holiday Season in you life, realize that just as important as it is to maintain a balanced budget, it's equally as important to take some time and acknowledge the things you ALREADY HAVE and the things YOU'RE CURRENTLY CAPABLE OF. Because trust me - It could ALWAYS be worse.

    Gratitude for the current life you have is something a lot of people overlook... I'm guilty of it too so don't think I'm getting on a soap box here. It is important though to think about how far you've come and what you've accomplished. Acknowledge that. Say to yourself, "Wow - I DO have a roof over my head. I DO have food to eat every day. I DO have access to health care. I DID get that job. I WAS a good Father / Mother this year to my kids. etc..." You'll come to find that you have a pack of blessings you don't normally think about.

     This will make you a more humble person and will teach you to appreciate the things that many people aren't fortunate enough to have. Not only does this build character (in my opinion) but on an unseen level Gratitude opens up a path for the Universe to keep giving you things. It's like telling the Universe "YES! I LIKE THAT!"  - so the Universe says "ok well here's some more!" - (many of you have probably heard of this kind of thing if you've read any current new age books or seen any of the movies they have out...)  but getting back on track ... I can almost guarantee that by keeping a thankful state of mind and doing something nice for someone else it basically creates a secret recipe to eliminate your own stress. Whatever is going on in your own life takes a backseat. You do something nice for someone who truly deserves it. And it will help put things into perspective for you as well -

      I can't speak for everyone here, but personally, it breaks my heart to look at my life and at the same time know that there are little kids out there who lost their parents in a tragic shoot out, or a little boy somewhere who isn't getting anything this year because his parents are alcoholics, or a little closer to my field of work - someone maybe going through a serious health problem and they're all alone to face it, or a young girl who has to choose between having an abortion or being disowned by her family... etc... It's all over, and this kind of stuff goes on daily..

     There is a lot of suffering and hardship in this world that I have never known. And that IS a big deal to me - and it's something to be truly thankful for.

    So in closing - it is my sincerest wish for you to take some time and find a way to get real with yourself this Holiday Season.

     If only for a little while, relax, light a candle, pray, or whatever you do - Tell the Universe how thankful you are for all the amazing things you have. Tell the Universe you are happy, healthy, enjoying free will, making it through your circumstances just fine, and glad to be taking part in this awesome experience called life.

     And the next time you're out - put some change in the salvation army jug for god sakes. Buy the xmas tree sticker u can put your name on at the grocery store for donating to children's hospital. Sign up to buy a toy for a kid who's never gotten to play with anything cool, buy some food for the animals at the shelter that haven't had quality bones or tuna in god knows how long.

      One last thought - Isn't it interesting, that Love - the best feeling in the world, is infinite, and totally within our power to give freely - yet we have such a shortage of it on this planet. The possibilities are endless - Find a way to take what you're thankful for, take what makes you feel love, and spread it everywhere you go.


ooook phew!  - made it through the sentimental stuff


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       Psychic Self Defense - This is an interesting concept and one that deserves some attention. Let me first just say that in most cases Psychic Self Defense is not exactly necessary for people unless they are highly sensitive to other people's emotions or the atmosphere they happen to be in. - Or unless they meditate on a regular basis and have developed a sensitivity to other people's emotions or the atmosphere they happen to be in.

      Think of yourself as a multi dimensional being - you are controlling a physical vessel... this is the densest aspect of who you are. You are also carrying a gauge of emotional detection that will either make u feel good or make u feel bad (it can make you feel other ways but for these purposes it breaks down into either GOOD or BAD) - You are also in control of an internal amount of "intelligence" - you can think and ration and understand within your mind. There is "you" and there is "the rest of existence".

      In any interaction you have, whatever happens or anything that occurs all boils down to "You"- and that can be a little confusing or misleading... but it's true. Simply because "you" are in control of "you"- you can't control "the rest of existence" - Anything can be dealt with in terms of "you" - you're basically living in your own world. You could think of it that way - and you're the controller.

      There is a real amount of communication that occurs between people and things - much of it non verbal... most of it actually. Also, it's all completely guided and set up as part of a system higher than we can currently understand. but I digress....

      Sooooooo - you can do all this - thinking internally, being in control, effecting communication, etc - but so can everyone else on this planet for the most part. This is where it gets a little icky. If you meditate for a length of time, or just happen to be a sensitive type of person - your reception and "openness" to others becomes highly developed.

     On a higher frequency (which you're personally becoming familiar with now) everything blends together - we're all sharing the same "thought space" so it can make for some uncomfortable situations if you remain energetically open all the time.... (or it can make for some amazingly amazing situations at times too) - You gotta get a handle on your shit though.

     You can't just go around "open" all the time - you'll go crazy. You'll get so bogged down with emotion and trying to figure it all out, and why did he or she react this way to me, and wow my son must have learned that from one of the shitty kids at school and I know this person is feeling bad so i'll give them a pass on that rude remark, and wow that girl was checkin me out I can feel it, and I wonder if people can tell im really hungry right now, and blah blah blah.... it can be a friggin nightmare... SO what do we do?

      We learn about boundries, we learn about defense, and we learn about energy...

     One thing that really helps and something to always remember is when you meditate - you should always close down afterwards. Energetically speaking - as you breathe in and out, delve into yourself and the universe, you are in essence working with your chakras (I'll explain chakras soon) - but for now just know that when you feel love (probably in your heart area), or feel fear ("weak in the knees"), or get emotional (get a "lump" in your throat), or whatever else - it's all related to a system of energy centers that are a bit like our organs - on an unseen plane.

     Meditation can access, clean and heal all of these centers (trickling down to physical life making it nice and comfortable), but if you don't close down afterwards it's a bit like opening all the windows and doors in the house for a good cleaning and just not shutting them after. You become at risk for anything to just come in.

    So - Close down - Ground yourself - at the end of each meditation tell yourself (and feel yourself) closing things down, shutting your windows, locking the doors. I like to say something like "I'm becoming physical again, 80% physical, 20% mental"... imagine a firm force field of steel covered with white light around your entire body - (or something like that).... close down anyway u like really. Just make sure you do it.

    When you're out in public or going somewhere a lot of other people will be - make sure you surround yourself with white light, or a bubble, or something u like and can relate to. Tell yourself you're not going to allow any negative energy into your field of being. Call on your spirit guides or if you like a certain angel - ask for protection as you go about your day.

    Eventually if you get into crystals and stones there are some specific ones that will help you in this protection process. Carrying around a piece of "X" kind of stone or crystal will help you achieve "X" - depending on the situation you're going to be in, and the desired outcome.

    Another thing that works - when talking to people and dealing with conversation - I like to use a "passcode" - much like the passcode you have on your iphone or whatever... I lock up the "real me" and only I know the pass code - by that rationale - anything that anyone says or does can not have any effect on the real me cause I locked that mofo up. I save my most vulnerable self for the people I feel are truly interested and have something to truly offer.

    Work and other day to day interaction... This is tough because you meet people over the years and you want to show them parts of yourself, but you want to remain workplace friendly and appropriate as well. For me - I like to show about 35% of my personality at work - and do my best to surround it with an energy of "service to others" / "the world is a good place" - ... I'd say that's a fair estimation of what I try to put out there anyway. You can figure out your own percentage and put forth, or back off as much as you like. You'll find that some people are a little easier to share things with than others.

     Once you start working with these ideas they can become a lot of fun and there aren't really any limits.

     I WOULD certainly go as far as to say that this kind of thing can be extremely important, and in the world we live in currently, could very likely be lifesaving.

     If you ever find yourself in a serious situation - i.e. you get a bad vibe from someone who's been eyeballing your kid at the playground, you get a sudden feeling not to get in the car with that person who's had a few glasses of beer, you feel the urge to call that friend who you've noticed has been feeling depressed and acting odd lately - It could honestly be a lifesaving measure.

      I'm not saying bad things are out to get us - but I am saying it's good to practice mental borders / psychic defense techniques -  it will always give you a leg up.

     Best of luck you weirdos... lol  - keep meditating, and stay safe out there! xoxoxo




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       Life on the Turn Up - haha... Life IS good believe it or not, but what's even better is actively taking the bull by the horns and pointing things in the direction you want to go. Engaging the physical self is a great way to do that. It's good to experiment with how far you can push yourself. It's extremely rewarding too. Some of the things I've come to realize on this journey so far are as follows:

      I feel like if there is such thing as a hump or period of time it takes to figure out if you're serious about going to the gym or not - I am approaching it. I got through the initial phase of actually going there, meeting new people and looking weird as a beginner. I had my first realization that I would need to keep this up financially. I figured out how RAW would fit into my schedule more or less, and became aware of the physical/mental needs this kind of thing takes. So far I'm happy to say, I think I want to keep it going.

    I have to say that I feel like this existence def. creates change, and change is like the fuel for living life. To be always on the cusp of new experience, to be ready at all times - presenting my best foot forward. I mean that's just awesome, it's the best way to live. I don't want to sound all broey but I get it, I mean I get why people can become totally obsessed with this kind of stuff and make it a lifestyle. You take something, then transmute it to something better, and then something better, and then something better - all the while on every level it permeates and creates positive change in your life.

     I have felt some things I need to work on... I'd like to get more involved with the idea of diet and eating properly. I'd like to stock up on plenty of work outs to do on my own time too so I can keep a good flow going. Maybe even try out some supplements and experiment with that. Consistency is something else too... 2 or 3 times a week whenever I can make it probably isn't as good as 3-5 times a week, making sure it happens. Things like that... finding balance, keeping it going. All in all I can't complain though.

       The affect on my mental / emotional state has been quite positive... Things come more clearly to me. Meditation has been a lot more meaningful lately. I feel sharper and more focused. I'm not as upset about some things as I used to be.

      One thing blends into the next a little easier as well... This is hard to explain... but before I started RAW I remember I'd get so bummed out about going to work sometimes. My day would last forever it seemed... but now more recently I find that work breaks down into different segments. I'll do an hour here, an hour there... and before I know it I'm done. I feel like this is the concept of pacing myself - emanating in different aspect of my life. I don't know for sure though - this is just some observational stuff I've been noticing lately. AAAAnnnyway -

      So far so good -  It's been a sweet journey and I believe 100% that I'm that much better for it. I advise anyone to make working out, stackin' gains, exercise, whatever u wanna call it - a habitual part of life. The risk vs. reward is the best there is, the return on your investment is 100% - and it will take you on a personal journey that only you will understand.

BOOSH!


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Happy Holidays to all my friends/readers - You guys are awesome. Pleaaaaase stay safe out there and remember - "The real beauty is not in the words themselves, but in the listener that has the power to understand them.”  

....Happy new year too!





 



PUA Stuff.. Alphas, Betas and My Thoughts on What's Attractive / Taking Meditation Further / Gym Updates / Bonus

       So if you're a guy - at some point you must have noticed the idea that picking up girls, having relationships, getting laid, etc. has evolved into an art form in popular culture. Upping your game, getting better at your PUA skills, and trying to stay on point is like total guy commandment.

       One thing I find kind of interesting is the idea that guys break down into categories based on their fundamental relationship with the world around them. How guys act and behave - and how it applies to attraction is something I'm sure just about most guys would want to learn more about. So - this first section is one for the dudes.

       There are many different types of people out there, with different types of game and ability to attract... According to popular culture, however, guys typically break down into two categories (Alpha and Beta).
    
        Although more categories have been "discovered."  As mainstream as it gets - there are two fundamental types of guys:

       "Alpha" guys are the dudes that are always ON - Putting their best foot forward, keeping their energy up at all times, maintaining control, seeing their intention through to fruition. Full steam ahead - so to speak

       "Beta" guys are the ones who are a little more reserved, more acquiescent in relationships, time taking, ready and willing to be OFF in the face of daily life. Steady as she goes - so to speak.

       Most of what's out there seems to lean toward the idea that being Alpha is "better" than being beta... but according to some very reputable sources (and certainly my own life experience) - there are UPS and DOWNS to EACH side, and there is no such thing as an "all or nothing" formula that works magic... There are always two sides to every coin - right?

       By no means do I consider myself a "PUA"  or anything... but after looking around, reading a lot, watching a lot, and living a lot - here is what I've come up with. Allow your boy teej to break it down...     

       FIRST! Let me preface this by saying - "Self love is important, but self awareness is more useful." There IS definitely a division between the idea of Alpha and Beta and I'll give you that... When you read all the info and take a good look in the mirror I'm sure you will identify more with one side or another. You're either a macho all hands on deck kinda dude, or you're a laid back, let life take it's course kinds dude. (Think Discovery channels' "dual survival") - Now don't be alarmed, and don't believe the hype. No matter what any video or article says, being one or another doesn't make you any "better" or "worse" and the good news is, it's probably quite uncommon for anyone to be "PURE" Alpha or "PURE" Beta. Generally we switch between the two depending on certain situations.

       Now - speaking from my own point of view. Living in the real world... I've had Alpha friends, I've had Beta friends, I've seen Beta friends turn into Alpha friends, and I've seen Alpha friends turn into Beta friends. But I can tell you one thing for sure - there has never seemed to be any rock hard evidence that would suggest being one or another equals getting laid more.

       The guys who get laid the most are..... (drumroll please).... the guys who are most actively out looking to hook up with women. That's it. TA-DA!  Now one could certainly argue and say well obviously the guys who are out there trying to get laid are ALPHA - they're taking control, they have more drive, they're going after their prize....

     Well I got news for you, my friends... Beta people actively seek out hooking up / getting laid too, but just don't go about it in the same way Alpha people do. Motives are often very different, set and setting are often different, and certainly accomplished notoriety often different... It doesn't make things any "less" or "more"... It just makes things different.

       This is just the basic human condition! Whether you're Beta, Alpha, or talented enough to switch between the two,  humans like sex and we generally go after sex however we can, in a way that suits us best.

      Now that being said - let's talk a little about ATTRACTION. What is attraction? Well it is (as defined by whatever dictionary the internet uses):  the action or power of evoking interest, pleasure, or liking for someone or something. - The act of making someone or something favorable toward you. If the goal is to have more intimate experiences - we should all work on ATTRACTION... But people are as individual and unique as snowflakes - SO... this can get a bit tricky.

       Personally I'm not one of those guys who believes there is a quick fix... You can't "just be a certain way" that will give you amazing attraction power or have complete control over women. That notion is ridiculous... and first of all if you're in this game you should have an upright and quality examination of your motives. To get just a little off topic here... I'm sorry - but this is important to me - in my eyes a man who is simply out to "get laid" is NOT as manly as a man who wants a REAL relationship with someone, is willing to take care of his friends and family, is willing to raise his children, and is consciously moving toward a better future. "Game" should be a tool, not a crutch or way of life...

       Getting back on the attraction train... Variety as they say, is the spice of life. And I believe variety is where a lot of attraction lays... So HERE's five dollars worth of free advice - and I KNOW I'm not the only guy who thinks this way (so ladies take note!)... If you want to truly appeal to people..  There is NOTHING more stimulating and attention getting than a sincere, lighthearted change in your behavioral tendencies, your physical appearance, or your attitude.

       This kind of thing drives us wild. Especially as guys - we like moving around, we like different situations, we like proving ourselves in different situations... When girls show us different sides of their personalities it's like a new thing for us, a new challenge... and guys like challenges. We like feeling useful, and we like feeling that the territory is NEW. What I'm saying is that too much of the same old thing stagnates and becomes boring. Keep reinventing yourself and you will never ever go wrong. I promise. I wonder - Is this also true to some extent from a girl's perspective?

       In closing - Please keep in mind this is all just my shit head opinion and more or less based on observational / anecdotal experience only... but lemme tell you -  "Difference makes a difference."

 Here's some stupid game shit I found... Which do YOU identify with?


ALPHA: You are confident and definitely your own man. You do your own thing and have complete confidence in everything you do. You have your self doubts, but don't let it cloud your judgment. You are more known for being logical. You are well liked by almost everyone and have an easy charm / swagger about your presence. Women are drawn to your charisma and presence. You enjoy being social and having lots of people around. You are a natural leader

BETA: You are kind of shy or introverted and not very secure in most surroundings. You are constantly plagued by self-doubt and often lack commitment for fear of failure. You are somewhat liked by people but not viewed as anything special. You are more likely to become friends with women than commit to full relationships with them. You are nervous around large groups of people and find it's easier to be a follower in the majority of situations.

OMEGA: You are the opposite of the alpha male but not in a bad way. Like the alpha male you are confident, intelligent and have a sense of charisma about you. But unlike the alpha male, you are completely your own person. You do not need anyone. You can sometimes be emotionally distant due to your complete self-possession (borderline obsession in some Omegas). You trust few people and foster even fewer intimate relationships. Omegas do not place importance on leadership by others as they are perfectly capable of leading themselves.

GAMMA: You are basically the "invisible" guy. There is nothing really spectacular about you. You are not a beta, but neither are you an alpha. Your personality and presence usually blends in with the rest of the room and you're just sort of...there. People like you just fine and you usually don't have too much trouble with girls, but all the same, there is nothing particularly memorable or remarkable about you. You are not a born leader, nor are you an inherent follower. Although you can take on those tasks depending on the situation, you see no reason to.

SIGMA: You are a manipulative mastermind. Like a spider waiting to lay your trap. You possess a cunning, intuitive mind and can sway people to your will. You don't have the casual swagger of the alpha or the omega but you DO have a clever presence about you. People tend to be both wary of you and respect you at the same time. Your natural ability of persuasion makes you often more noted than Alphas or Omegas. You lead when it suits you, you follow when it suits you.

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       Meditation was the subject of last time's esoteric entry. I wrote about what it is and how it can help your life. This week's part will be a little on taking it a bit further and bringing it to the next step.

       So maybe some of you are familiar with meditation (the kind I'm discussing / writing about is "passive" meditation just F.Y.I.) the concept of quieting your inner self, relaxing the body, giving yourself the freedom to just let things in your inner world come and go. You know what meditation is, has to offer, and maybe you've even tried it a couple times... So what's next? What can we expect? Where do we go from here? - I will do my best to explain things.

       If you actually gave meditating a try a week or so ago, by now I'm willing to bet the MOMENTUM has starting to dwindle. Very understandable. You may think to yourself, "I put all this effort into getting ready, finding the time, quieting the house, and u know what happens? NOTHING! - I tried it a couple of times and it's starting to seem more like a chore. I'm so busy - honestly who has time to just sit around for 15-20 minutes a day??" These are all very typical and understandable things that people go through when they start this process. Fear not -

      What can help this? First of all - DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF... This is a very real process and it takes time to truly develop.

      Another thing you should do is start a meditation journal. Do your meditation, then actually write down how you felt before and how you felt after. Write down all the things that came into your mind. Write down what seems to be bothering you the most, what makes you the happiest, what you wish for in the future, etc... Writing down gets you more involved in the process and you'll find it more rewarding in the long run to be able to look back on things you've written.

       Add some things to help you get in the mood - Insence, Candles, Music and stuff can all help. Have you ever walked into a church? Right off the bat you just about feel holier, this is cause the atmosphere is so juiced up and concentrated. If you're having trouble meditating - concentrate your atmosphere and that will certainly help.

       REMEMBER why you're doing this - When you can, when your mind is quiet.. remember you want a better life, a more fulfilling participation in the world, a clearer and more appreciative recollection of the past, an index of various emotions that are only known and identifiable to you, an overall feeling of complete freedom, a greater sense of connectedness to the people in your life. Think about how your life will change for the positive. Meditation will help you achieve all of this.

       Eventually after you've been at it for a few weeks or so you will start to look forward to this few minutes a day of "me" time. It takes a little effort and sometimes you just have to suck it up, grin and MAKE IT HAPPEN. Start thinking of it as giving yourself 15-20 minutes of absolute FREEDOM time to JUST BE. You're busy enough when you think about it. You're living an active daily life in 2015 - 15-20 minutes of time to sit, be yourself and relax is like heaven. You're tending to your mind, it's fitness for your inner self.

       Most importantly though - DON'T GIVE UP! Even if you skipped a few days, even if you feel stupid or like it's not working - Keep at it. It doesn't take long to see some results and start developing an appreciation for this process. In time you will start to see MAJOR results.

       Some things that MAY crop up along the way:

      You might start to feel a little more emotional in your day to day life. Around people and situations you might feel yourself getting a little "heady." You might feel like you're occasionally picking up vibrations from the world around you. When you meditate you basically get in tune with your inner self. You are actively realizing and giving life to your own emotions / feelings / instincts... and trust me you will definitely start to pin point the things that make you feel a certain way. This is a good thing, but there can be some pitfalls. It's a good time to start thinking about and familiarizing yourself with "psychic self defense." I'll get more in depth with that a bit later, but for now just realize that just like we have locks on our doors, like we wear clothes for protection, like we have passwords on our computers, - the mind needs to take the same kind of precautions, especially if you're looking to get serious about this kind of work and actually get anywhere with it.

       You may find that some people in your life may not understand the type of endeavor you're embarking on and it may seem strange or silly to some. If you stick to your own resolve this won't be a big issue. Consider it like you're trying a new sport, or taking a new class.

      You will start to get a "feel" for the co-creative universe at times. You'll start to get bursts of feelings, "hunches", and find that "coincidences" start happening more often. When this happens, I've always found it to be extremely reinforcing. You'll soon begin to realize that you have more control over things in life than you once believed.

      One more thing... This is the beginning of a journey that some of us will be on for the rest of our lives, some of us only for a little while, and others not even after the first couple of steps. It depends a lot on your personal karma... They say it takes three lifetimes of steadfast interest / dedication to become ready for a serious life on this path.

       It would be a good idea to take a little time and think of what kind of relationship you want to have with meditation. Embrace it and see what it can do for you. Give it an honest chance it deserves. How important do you consider your inner world? What are your personal beliefs when it comes to God, the purpose of life, the Universe, etc...

       You might find you'd like to have just a few useful tools to help unwind, stay grounded, etc during day to day life. You might find you're interested in some esoteric activities but not others.. or you might even find that this way of life is something you want to keep around and growing with for the long haul. Again - it depends largely on your own thoughts / feelings about it.

       Good luck in all that you do. I wish you the very best as you keep developing a relationship with yourself and the world around you.

      Keep meditating - Next time I'll try to convey some methods of basic psychic self defense.

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       I've been going to the powerhouse RAW classes for about a couple weeks now and just wanna write about how I'm doing and what the experience has been like thus far... I'll explain the metaphysical ramifications it's had on me and follow it up by the social / earthly experience I've had... and then end by pointing out one by one how amazingly gorgeous each girl is in the class.

       ... ; ) haha ooooook so I'm not actually gonna do the last part. but if you're reading this I'm glad I got ur attention : )

       Keep in mind I can only speak from my own point of view, but if there's anyone out there that can gain some insight / motivation from this to change their life (in any positive way) I'm happy to do it...
     
       I actually entered the RAW experience during a time in my life that just kind of clicked and fell into place for me - It felt very much like I was SUPPOSED to start doing it... and I think that probably helps a lot.

       I'll give you a little background...  Going back to the Summer... Essentially for some time I felt like I just kind of plateaued in life. I started realizing I did the college thing as far as I could take it for the time being (I had a son early in life and that can make things like school / jobs really complicated..), I felt like I finally achieved a decent job in a career field I feel good about (for now),  and I knew I wanted to take a SERIOUS break in romantic relationships so I could focus on myself...

      Eventually after sort of distancing myself from everything so I could really start taking Occultism seriously I became aware that I wanted to fulfill my greatest potential... and now we'll get a little metaphysical...

      Once you delve into this path of self exploration, occultism / meditation / alternative spirituality - whatever u wanna call it - I believe there is a very real point that occurs when you take a hard look at yourself and become totally aware of everything about you and HOW everything about you occurred. Not only that - but you ALSO REALIZE that you are in full control of your life and you can absolutely do or have anything you want. The idea of WILL comes into play and pretty much gets magnified. You essentially discover the bliss of freedom, and what that can mean for you.

       NOW - this is where powerhouse / RAW comes into place. As western Occult theory goes - As we are currently living in a PHYSICAL reality - anything PHYSICAL that we do, we feel the reaction of very quickly. This can be applied to many things in the physical reality. For example if you're feeling sad or unhappy, and then watch a silly movie or lighthearted comedy chances are you will FEEL a difference. If you are feeling stagnant, lazy, lethargic... and then you rearrange your living space, it will give an effect. If you're feeling under the weather - and then get under the covers, eat some chicken soup and get a much earlier bedtime than you're used to, most likely you're gong to reap the rewards (effects of that cause) -

       In terms of doing something Physical for your BODY - you can't help but enhance you're overall LIVING experience! EVERYTHING becomes BETTER.

       In essence - while you're here in this reality - you carry around a body. You move about, interact, feel, sense, and PERCIEVE via your physical body. If you treat your body nicely, put good things into it, and kick it's ass through some serious workout activity-  your body will adjust to the demands, and you will feel the difference it makes VERY quickly. -

       This is the kind of thing I'm after in this phase of my life. I want to bring my physical self up to a point where I feel just on top of the world everywhere I go. And this is the "metaphysical" reason I think I ended up at a gym, around people, around action - to help boost the physical side of my existence, which by natural law MUST enhance the mental / emotional side as well.

       But as far as the social aspect and earthly testimonial have been for me, I can tell you - Things have been nice. The work outs - WODS will give you a run for your money that's for sure. Personally - I thought I was getting a "workout" back in the summer when I'd go run a few laps and do some pushups behind the field house. UHH - nope! lol - Being part of a class, around other people def. helps in terms of motivation and pushing your limits. This aspect is VERY sweet for me.

      Ummm let's see... You get to meet new people too which is nice. For me It's like - ok awesome - this is me getting out and doing stuff. I'm actively getting out more and being part of something greater than myself. Sweet.                

      There ARE some physical changes you get to experience - your body starts to get used to the movements, you're sore and then you recover, you enjoy sleep more, you feel better about yourself, etc... This is a very HEALTHY endeavor.

       Some personal pitfalls:

       .... realizing that you could be so much more is kind of like a thorn in your side. It's like realizing well shit, if I really wanted to I could make it so this is a full time thing, my life would TOTALLY change around ... but am I ready for that? Am I willing to do it? - These kinds of thoughts eat away at me...

       There is a level of "mercy vs severity" thing that I think we all have to find the balance between... It's nice to think oh well things are always conducive and they don't judge me and it's all about my comfort level and this and that... but realistically the only way you're going to get any results is to get the fuck out of that comfort zone lol and sometimes you're gonna feel a little bit like WOW this is some crazy shit... - I feel this is a good thing though cause you're testing the limits of your mind and body - and you become a better person that way.

       Other lifestyle habits - This one's tricky... There are definitely some things in my life that don't exactly positively correlate to working out and getting fit. This is a personal battle, and it's in your face pretty consistently. My experience is that the more I push my body, the more works outs I do, the more WILL I use - the less important the unhealthy extracurricular activities seem to be.
       For example after I just kicked my ass and feel good about myself, riding high on those endorphins... when I come home - the LAST thing I wanna do is binge out on junk food or lay on the couch and watch tv for 3 hours...
      Metaphysically speaking it goes back to the concept that "like energy attracts like energy." - If you want more of something, start with the idea of that something and keep at it. Keep thinking it, and keep making yourself feel it. Once you're doing it - keep doing it. The more you do something, the more you CAN do something. You feel me?

       I hope this provided some entertainment to all my awesome readers. I encourage positive change in life. It's one of the BEST feelings in the world to have an idea / desire - plan a way to obtain / achieve it - and fucking accomplish it. It's empowering like a mofo.


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Bonus!

Congratulations to Chris Rosenquest who nailed the election for County Legislature District 9 - Thanks to anyone who read my previous entries and sent out that kind of vibe in his direction - He's in - now let's see what happens!


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Thanks for reading! Elevate yourself, Shine your light into the world, aaaaaand stay tuned for more Tjism...





      

Halloween, Gym updates, Meditation

....... So hopefully everyone had a safe and enjoyable Halloween this year. I'd say mine was just about average. I got to enjoy some fun times on the job (and actually placed third in the annual costume contest), got to spend some time with my son (which is always sweet), and got to have a minor mental break down by the end of the night (which can be very liberating).

        I dressed up as a dark entity / dark angel for work and it was pretty intense. I'm not usually one to make a big fuss about things but in an effort to prevent FOMO I decided to dress up. Here I am:



        This experience has 2 parts. The first part is characterized by an overwhelming feeling of absolute insecurity. The second part by mostly feeling good and self pride. So here we go...

        I walk in to my workplace. It's 7:00am on Friday (Halloween is on Saturday). I'm walking up the steps and begin to notice that NOT ONE SINGLE person has a costume on aside from myself. I make the long walk to the Nurse's station and can see I'm surrounded by every one of my professional collogues, plus the weekly Doctor, a Podiatrist, the Podiatrist's assistant, and a butt load of student nurses that just happen to be there for clinical. Everyone's talking about important things, getting ready for the day, and of course - dressed very professionally.

     Needless to say I stood out a bit. Just about immediately I'm offered smiles, gestures, comments and various glances - 50% genuine / 50% "wow tj you must feel like a total douche right about now, but maybe my comment will help you feel better." I try to compose myself as one of the residents pointed and exclaimed through pure guttural laughter, "oh man - I feel bad for you!" - Thanks.... wow.

       So anyway panic hits me like a freight train and I'm having some internal dialogue, "You're ok tj, it's the season, IT IS the costume contest today, you're smart, you're funny, you're cool... You can do this" combined with "Jesus please let me hold this down, what if I'm the ONLY person who dresses up, oh my God you're gonna die tj, everyone's gonna remember this day as the biggest fuck up of your whole life!" Quite the adventure so far... and it's only about 7:30am

     BUT - good things come to those who wait thank God because eventually I realized that some people were wearing Halloween oriented scrubs, others were handing out candy and stickers, etc. Residents began to dress up once they were ready for the day, and shortly after 10 am TJ began to feel something like his old self again.

       By the end of the day there were actually a lot of people dressed up. We were having fun, I was getting a lot of compliments, I felt good, and actually placed 3rd in the contest for my costume. I was awarded with a gift card to dunkin donuts. A few hours of being out of my comfort zone for a good couple of caffeine buzzes? Overall I feel like it was well worth it. One of life's little social experiments...

       Later on that night I went out with my Son, Cale, but we didn't end up too far because he started to feel cold and his feet started to hurt. He is getting over a nasty bug so I understood where he was coming from. To save the night I offered to drive him around some of the "haunted" places on the old PAFB - Cale REALLY enjoyed that so I was happy to do it for him. By the end we were hungry and decided to cap the night off with a pizza. We talked about ghosts and witches and other scary things... Not too shabby.

       Many of you know me for being cool, calm, collected, mellow, even keeled, etc... Not much ever seems to bother me, and for the most part I enjoy things that way. So hopefully it will be a nice change to share something with you that actually did bother me, make me think some severe thoughts, and how I came out of it.

       Just as I was getting ready for bed I came down with a sudden and very intense hatred for my living situation, my family, my endeavors, my life in general. All at once I felt like my whole life was just a series of failed attempts at things, and that I would never ever get anywhere I wanted to be. I have a very low tolerance for people who get so wasted on drugs and alcohol that they can barely function properly /  or under go severe personality changes / or do selfish and stupid things - (for personal reasons I won't go further on that subject) but suffice it to say I was dealing with that in a variety of forms. On top of that I was tired, cold, worried about financial things, worried about having a functioning relationship with my son, worried that I don't know how to have a relationship with anyone, resigning myself to a 10x10 room, forever doomed to be a bottom bound loser.

       It hit me really hard and the thought of just driving away seemed really appealing at the moment. The feeling of pure escape felt so amazing. To just leave it all behind... I held on to that feeling as long as I could and eventually came to the conclusion that although I wouldn't be able to fix any of my circumstances right away, the mental feeling of liberation was quite nice. The feeling of - "hey... fuck it." Fuck it! right? What an amazing concept - It felt really good... Now, I've said fuck it before but never have been quite so walked through the appropriate context.
   
       I was feeling REALLY shitty. I mean just awful. Like out of the ordinary awful - but then it was followed by a feeling of pure joy and even a type of selfish awareness like I stumbled across a secret. fuck it - as in just letting it all be. Surrendering all the crappy stuff, letting it go and realizing life goes on. I still have control and my CIRCUMSTANCES aren't ME. Like I said before, it was very liberating.

       As I'm writing this, looking back. I think this was just a case of bad day / bad energy or something along those lines. Feeling low and self loathing is something I'm sure a lot of people do on occasion. But in conclusion, I would like to say that something kind of interesting happened. I don't particularly enjoy bad things when they occur, but I do find it necessary to REALLY appreciate the good things that life has to offer. Consider it to be a lesson in letting go / self forgiveness / the art of allowing.

     We should all say fuck it once in while.


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....... Last time I said I would talk a little bit about "Bro fever" and how that happens when you start going to the gym. I'm not sure if there is such a thing as "Bro fever" - but personally, I find myself getting more and more into the lifestyle of actively taking measures to improve my physical health. I find myself getting excited about going there, getting involved, feeling good afterwards, knowing physical results will come. I'm spending more time looking at gym stuff on line, getting tips and tricks, reading up on supplements and eating techniques. Embracing soreness haha

       I'm going on my second week of membership, and so far so good. I feel that initial nervousness is subsiding. I know everyone there at this point and feel like I'm among friends. Workouts are starting to sink in, I'm learning new moves, proper form, and getting into the flow of the class. My work schedule seems to allow for it as well which is nice.

       Touching back to an important topic (and to get a little metaphysical) - Stress / feelings of self hatred / feeling that life sucks, etc... the gym is like a cure for all that. It's interesting and now that I think about it - I feel that maybe getting involved with powerhouse is metaphysically similar to taking my life and slamming it down on a table, much like you would do with a pack of cards / cigarettes to straighten them out. Or if you're into fish tanks, rocking it back and forth violently to get all the gravel even on the bottom.

       Really intense feelings come from out of nowhere, I feel different at work, I feel different at home. Maybe it's all part of the process of starting something that's life changing and having to ride out the ripples that flow through you current life. (By this notion, the moment of negative self realization I had on halloween was just part of things settling - the gravel evening out.) Like I said before - Physical changes are felt very powerfully in the realm we're living in. They should be looked at seriously.

       To get back on track.... YES  - gym / "bro" / health fever - it's contagious. It's a good thing and a wild ride to boot. More updates to come - In the mean time I think you should hit up powerhouse gym. If you wanna start diggin' deep, looking good and feeling good you should get involved with RAW feat. Jenn Thume ; ))

       and watch this guy for some broscience in the mean time:

                                                "50% fact 50% magic 100% results"  (lol)   

    

     





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....... OK - Meditation - This is probably going to be a little lengthy so bare with me. You will get good information I promise. Meditation is crucial for becoming more in tune with the world around you. Meditation enables you to bridge the gap between the physical and non-physical. Meditation is stress relieving. Meditation allows you to turn your attention inward, make realizations about things, become more familiar with your personal truths, make you a calmer person, help you become more understanding - and the PHYSICAL health benefits are astounding. No pill you could take in the world is more natural, effective and less side effexy than plain old meditation.

       In terms of Occultism, it's not only effective, but actually quite necessary to meditate on a regular basis. If we want to start penetrating to the deeper levels of existence and get more in synch with the world around us we need to take some time and actually invest in this process. It doesn't have to be MUCH time - but it does have to be HONEST time. 15-20 minutes a day is just fine. It's always been my opinion that it's better to be consistent. doing 15-20 minutes EVERY day will give much better results than doing it for an hour ONCE during the entire week. Life moves at a very high speed and meditating in short bursts daily will have a broader impact.

       So what do I mean when I talk about meditation? I'm talking about the active turning inward of your focus / attention. When you meditate you sort of forget about the outside world for a little bit and focus your attention inward. You become more aware of what's going on in the inside. You become more aware of your feelings, thoughts, worries, concerns, etc... you can figure things out and get to the root of issues you're dealing with. You can place your attention on certain situations / matters and come to a better relationship with them.(Once you start doing this regularly, you can begin to understand what makes you tick, you become more aware of what truly makes you feel good, and also what seems to bother you.) Ultimately meditation (in my opinion) teaches us that we are in control of our attention, but furthermore, wherever we place our attention becomes our reality. Have you ever heard "A man is what he thinks about all day long." ? or "I think, therefore I am"? - you start to feel me on this?

       There are as many ways to meditate as there are people on the earth. - That's an old joke. It's true though. Every person is totally unique and individual - and our paths to enlightenment are our own. Kind of like Frodo in lord of the rings - He's got to do it on his own. So do we. There are some basic correlating things that can assist you along the way though. This next few lines will explain "HOW" to meditate -

       You should aim for a time you're not likely to be disturbed. Late evening before you go to bed is ok. Right after you get home from work is good too. Some people prefer right after they wake up in the morning. Ideally you want to be alone and unbothered. Whatever works for your schedule. Make time work for you.

       You also want silence! Don't try to meditate when the kids are running all over, when you've got 15 minutes to be to work, when you're expecting an important call in half an hour. You want to be totally at peace and able to be on your own for a good 15-20 minutes.

       Where should you meditate? Some say the bathroom is the most "psychic" / "calm" place in our homes, but I've never felt it to be a proper place to meditate myself. I prefer a living room chair, or the side of my bed. You want to make sure you won't get too cold either. After a few minutes of just being, the body tends to cool off and it's helpful to have a blanket or be already wearing full clothing. You can dress up the space with candles, incense, pictures of relatives, statues and whatnot - anything that will help to switch that portion of your mind on is helpful. You want to be physically comfortable. Make sure you're sitting in a nice chair, padded mattress, comfortable carpeted floor, etc. You're trying to get the physical body comfortable so it's happy while you're going deeper into yourself and the world around you. ....So pick a good place, that's quiet, during a part of the day when you have some time. If you can't find time - MAKE time. So ok, you're comfortable and ready to meditate - now what?

       Some people like to listen to a guided meditation CD, or some new age type soothing music - This is fine. It depends on your personal taste. This is ALL about YOU - so trust your instincts. An actual guided CD can help because it brings you right through, you get to experience the feeling, and generally it does the trick. Soothing music is fine too, because it helps your mind switch to a lower frequency and achieve that meditative state. I myself have always preferred silence. Just plain old silence. I might listen to some soothing music beforehand to get me in the mood - but I have always believed that silence gives the truest and most solid connection with one's self. (and oddly enough, you'll notice our world is rarely ever truly "silent")

       If you decide on listening to a guided meditation CD you're in for a journey because there are hundreds of them, all different ideas and ways of bringing you to your center. Some help to connect you with the earth, others connect you to spirit guides or help you remember past lives...There are so many that I can't speak much further on that. Just know - if you're listening to a guided CD you're under the influence of that CD and that idea / concept. If, however, you're on your own and going solo; meditation might look like something as follows:

      You can close your eyes to start. Take a few deep breathes and allow your physical body to begin to relax. You're looking to slow down your breathing and hit a rhythm like you would if you're falling asleep. You're not falling asleep though. You're actively slowing down your body so you can go deep and become more aware of your thoughts and feelings. At first it's going to seem a bit hard, like you can't "not" think about something - and this is normal. You'll start thinking of things that worry you, things that are nagging you, things that stick out in your life - If this happens just acknowledge the thought, give it a meaning and purpose, let it go, and come back to your breathing / meditation.

      Breathe in and out for a few minutes... easily, effortlessly, without judgment, with Universal rhythm. Eventually you'll find your "sweet spot" and you can breathe in and out perfectly without even feeling it. During this deep phase things will come to the surface. You'll begin to feel stronger emotions toward certain situations. You can sort through all the rubble and garbage you carry with you day to day. You're becoming more familiar with yourself and what your personal truths are.

      Breathe in for a few more minutes - or as long as you like really. Take this time to be completely on your own - completely free. take this time and just be. Simply be. Set your energy to the frequency of life on this earth. This great big earth.

      When you're ready and feel you've had a good session - you can begin to actively, slowly tell your attention to come back to your PHYSICAL body and your PHYSICAL surroundings. Wiggle your fingers, open your eyes, look around, and let yourself come back to HERE and NOW.

      Chances are you will feel much different. End by choosing to feel a sensation of gratitude that you are now THAT much more knowledgeable of yourself, your thoughts and feelings. Keep in mind this is a trip you can take over and over again.

       For many of us at first it will seem like this is something we don't want to do, something that's useless, or just a pain in the ass. This is because not many of us ever do this and we just aren't used to it! You need to go through the process of building up momentum... I can't stress this enough. It's supposed to feel uncomfortable / weird at first... but soon it becomes something you look forward to. Eventually after you build up some momentum, it grows. Your sessions become better and it will start to show up in your waking day to day life.

      You become conscious of the deeper issues going on, you realize you have control, you resonate to the things and places you belong to. Life becomes more fun, you notice "coincidences" all the time, you feel more fulfilled, you feel like you're playing a bigger part. You're truly on a real adventure. The adventure of your life!

      So look at you - You've penetrated into one of the secrets of the Universe, and you've taken the first steps on your path to enlightenment. If you feel like giving this a try, I promise you won't regret it. Like anything else, the more you put into it, the more you get back. One final note - Not all of us are going to be Picassos, or Jimmy Pages, or Buddhist Monks, but that doesn't mean we can't ENJOY the activity we like, and it doesn't mean we won't see results in our own lives. I wish you the best of luck as you start meditating.

      Next time for my metaphysical discussion I'll talk about how we as humans interact with the world around us. I'll probably touch on the energy centers in our bodies and the relationship between "us" and "the outside world" - stay tuned my truly amazing and super cool friends...............................

      
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Thanks for reading - Questions, comments, concerns appreciated!


   

  

Powerhouse Gym / First Occultism Entry! / Don't forget...

....... So I recently got a membership to a local gym called "Powerhouse" in Plattsburgh, NY. I ended up taking one of the classes they offer regularly, got to check the place out, meet some people, work out, and ultimately have a pretty sweet experience. To anyone reading this now, I would say that Powerhouse seems to be one of the cooler gyms in the area. From signing up, to the actual workout, and all the bits and pieces in between, Powerhouse has been a new and exciting endeavor in my life. So read this and learn what it's like from a beginner's perspective:

       I decided to go with Powerhouse mostly because a friend of mine from work goes there and always had good things to say about it. Also the gym is really close to where I live, which is a big plus for me. Personally I hadn't done anything really active in a about a couple months due to a fractured elbow, so I was understandably ready to get back into some form of action. It's also coming into the colder season here so a gym membership seemed like a good idea to get back into an active lifestyle without having to brave the crappy weather. Ultimately I headed down to Powerhouse a few days ago to see the place and talk to someone about getting a membership.

       Parking was fine, the building is easily accessible and the general flow is very easy to understand. I found myself inside looking around. Only a few people were there to work out at the time (it was mid morning). One woman in front of me had a tray of nutritional (homemade it looked like) baked goods she appeared to be delivering to sell. While she conducted business with the woman behind the counter I took a look around. Various cardio machines, TV's positioned on the wall, nutritional supplements, clothing of all sorts, various flyers and post-ups caught my eye. Beyond my line of sight was another section of the gym in which a few more people appeared to be using. After taking my turn with the woman at the desk I ended up with a Monthly membership. - Pricing, I might add, is quite reasonable and there are some good deals to be had. If you have a group, if you're a senior, a college kid, etc. you can get a discount. My first actual workout experience, however, was later on that night  - at a regularly scheduled class the gym offers.

       I met my friend from work at the gym, she showed me around, and introduced me to some of the fellow class takers. We looked at some of the new equipment they have set up and waited for some more class people to show up. Shortly after everyone was gathered, the woman who runs the class showed up and got to work preparing what we would be doing that night. Everyone was very nice and welcoming toward me which I found to be very grounding. Everyone seemed to be more or less around the same age group as well, which was reassuring, fun and cool. After some brief introductions we began to exercise.

       I'm getting over a fractured elbow so some of the moves I couldn't really do. I was, however, able to get a good work out in with the help of the instructor. Overall I would have to say the workout itself is very good. Your limits are definitely pushed, but you don't ever feel incapable, left out or driven to the point where you start to feel negative. Very balanced and progression oriented, you're timed and watched. When you need help, help is offered. Music is played and that's always a plus in my book. And by the end of the class you become a pile of sweaty jello - but in a good way! Not once did I feel I was pressured into anything or made to be feel left out or anything like that. Advice is freely given, everything is really motivational, you get to learn proper form, and you're motivated to strive for your personal best. Basically everything you could WANT in a place like that is available. It's actually pretty fun and you definitely feel included... and not to mention if you're a heterosexual male - the company is quite lovely. In short - I got pretty hooked.

       As far as "my personal" experience goes, here it is:

     I felt pretty much at ease just being in the facility, but was definitely a little nervous when it came to the performance part. Meeting new people, doing new exercises, not knowing the flow of the class, etc was a little nerve-racking. Looking back on all this, though, I feel as if that sort of thing is probably quite normal for newbies. I can absolutely tell you though, as I'm writing this, I feel a renewed sense of self and there is truly an almost addictive quality in all this. You start to see all the possibilities, realize you've come this far, envision how great it would be to achieve your goals and you end up feeling like, "hell yeah! I'm doin' this, I'm goin' for it, things are coming true, I'm the fuckin' master of my destiny!" - lol sorry to get a little overboard. but yes - I've come to realize that physical changes make a WORLD of difference - and take it from me - I've only been around that place for a few hours or so at the most and I already feel a shift in my reality. I urge anyone at all to go for this kind of thing. On an esoteric level, we live in a reality where physical changes are felt just about immediately, and you WILL feel a difference I'm telling you. You CAN NOT go wrong by testing yourself and striving to become a better physical version of yourself. The group is made to feed off each other and motivate one another ...also - I did get quite sore. More sore than ever working out alone.. but with this also comes a very much enjoyable knowledge that if I keep this kind of thing habitual, change will come. Things will always be new and amazing. From an Occult perspective, I've always been told that it's a good thing to keep your physical body in check, treat it nicely, become friends with it, and you will reap the rewards. And now I'm starting to honestly believe that. Very Cool. \m/ - Next time I want to talk a little about getting involved at a gym and coming down with Bro fever. Stay tuned..............................................................................................................................................




.......So - Ladies and Gents, this marks the first time I'm writing a passage that's more or less directed toward my main activity of study / interest. This being "Occultism." My aim for the future is to clean things up a bit and bring my readers to a more focused point of interest. Before now most of my entries have been just thoughts, things I've found to be funny or noteworthy, and basically an online journal of sorts. Not to fret, I will maintain some fun ideas, opinions, as well as make sure to update you all with details from my personal life. Cause hey, that's just fun... However, in the meantime let me take a moment and give you a first "real" entry on an honest to God "topic." Allow me to talk about something I feel I know a significant amount about: Occultism

       So when a lot of people hear about Occultism they tend to get these images in their heads about things like Jim Jones, drinking the coolaid, the hail bop people, Charles Manson, and this whole idea of mind control. Being forced into believing something totally and utterly against their will, to some evil and horrible end.  How horrible... but take it from me -"Occultism" has nothing to do with "Cults" - we live in a society that often blends the two ideas though and I think this is where a lot of the apprehension / scare factor comes from.

     Occultism in it's truest sense - as some of you might already know - simply means - "hidden" knowledge. No more, no less. Some of my healthcare friends have certainly heard of "occult" blood... this just means blood that is "hidden" or unidentifiable by most methods... Occultism is a branch of knowledge that deals in the hidden / subtle / not actively thought about nature of things. Occultism in practice, on its own - deals with the true nature of reality and the Universe, and has always seemed less religious and more scientific than anything (from what I've experienced).

    There are principals in place in Occultism, there are methods of achieving results, there are systems in order. For those of you who are mathematically minded - this is not just airie fearie fluff some crazy new agers conjured up. This is essentially the culmination of the efforts of centuries of study of the true nature of things as we know it. Passed down for hundreds of years. This brings us to the next logical obstacle- and one many people will never get over...

     "What's so high and mighty about 'Occultism' / hidden knowledge??" What on earth would make it appealing or useful? What makes it any "better" than anyone else's beliefs? This is a tough one to get around because each individual is on his or hers own life trajectory, and what we are doing here in this time and space is differentiated between each individual .... Hence one of the reasons for the definition of esoteric - "for the few"... Not only do you truly have to be "open minded" to grasp this kind of stuff, but it must also correlate to your own personal Karma. Furthermore - It's my personal belief that although at one point learning about this stuff was dangerous in society - It's also just stuff the normal day to day person doesn't think about.

     That being said, for those of you who wish to continue reading, please do so - for those who do not, I wish you the best in finding your own personal path to God / Source energy. To my dear, interested people, I will give you the best idea I can (based on my own experience and knowledge) of what Occultism is and how it can benefit you.

     Occultism as I've come to understand through years of solitary and group study is essentially the active learning and application of the hidden forces of nature. An approach toward the hidden aspects of our reality as we currently know it. Going based on what we have right here / right now, the way things are right in front of us, in order to raise our awareness and enjoy a more fulfilling life.

     Penetrating into the deeper aspects of the our human experience and as it relates to the cosmos, we start to make very amazing realizations. We start to understand some of the patterns, and we start to say "wow.." Once one starts understanding more and more of their own personal truths, they'll start having more confirmations into the overall structure of how things are,  and eventually find their lives begins to FLOURISH. A major lightening thought moment sets in and the difference between the things that truly matter in this world, and what can just be left at the wayside is actively realized.

     In essence you start to become more effective, more powerful, more fulfilled, more sensitive, and more understanding of the world around you. Things will start to have a deeper meaning, life becomes purposeful, you begin to play with the surroundings you find yourself in.

     What's going on is that you're actively and purposefully pulling down "God" into your earthly reality, while actively and purposefully raising your own awareness into the vibration of "holiness" (WHOLE-iness) - you become a bigger piece in the cosmic puzzle. A searcher, a receiver, and spreader - of the highest forms of truth, love, and awareness.

     I realize this might be a tough pill to swallow for some of you... It's hard to go along with the idea that things are already set up the way they're supposed to be.. Especially with all the hurt and pain in this world, (and especially if you've been beaten over the head with organized religion.) Also it's hard to convince yourself that there is any deeper meaning to life when you've lived so many years without needing to think about it.

     On a personal note - If this helps, I myself can clearly remember a long time ago before I started "seeking" - when I just accepted my lot in life, was happy to go along with things, however they may be. I had a little bit of religion when I was very young, but soon enough it faded away (which I suspect is quite common for most people now a days) - I had nothing really to go by, and no real reason to. I remember thinking about things like magic(k), astrology, dream work, angels, etc. and shrugging it off as mumbo jumbo, or just something silly for entertainment. So, my very cool readers, I know both sides of the coin. As I grew older, however, things changed my outlook and I soon realized it was worth delving into the unseen.

     One more thing - KEEP IN MIND - I'm not trying to PUSH anything on to anyone or try to say MY beliefs are better, or that YOU have it wrong... This is all simply an explanation of something that I've found to work and be useful in life. I just happen to believe in it so much that I want to at least put some of these ideas out there and give other people the chance to decide for themselves. I'm telling the truth when I say it sincerely changed my life.

     In conclusion, I wish to push a few important points across to my wonderful readers: First of all Occultism is not necessarily a BAD thing. Essentially it works depending on the operator (like just about everything else in this world) - We get what we put in to it. Secondly, not everyone is able to accept these ideas - and that's not a bad thing either. There are many paths to source, and for those of you who resonate to these ideas and think you might have found something, kudos to you. I can promise you, you're in for a truly special treat. There is nothing in this world quite as unique, amazing, powerful, and awe inspiring as having a working, contemporary, breathing relationship with the universe. For those of you who think I'm a wack job - reading something else would probably be a good idea. These ideas are not for you, and you're place is probably somewhere else. Lastly, I will do my best to continue writing information from my own life and experience, in effort to spark the divine search in others. As honestly and from the heart as I can.


     Now that you have a little background on what I'm talking about, next time I will discuss the whole conept of MEDITATION, how it relates to occultism, and why it is an important and valuable endeavor if you wish to embark on this path..............................................................




....... The following is my PERSONAL OPINION:

        Don't forget - County legislature election day is coming up on NOV 3rd. My man Chris Rosenquest has to get locked in. Big up to PAFB peeps, to anyone who remembers those days, and anyone who wants to bring some life back to this area. It's been a waste land for too long around here and we could use a nice injection of younger blood in office to act and get things done. Too many of our leaders seem to just be looking out for themselves. Old guys keeping themselves rich, fat and happy. Giving out the bare minimum and lacking organization, this area is SO not community oriented... "Narrow, unenlightened self interest does not impress me." Rosenquest is qualified, energetic, accessible, and looking out for the entire community. I urge any and all of my readers to vote for him on NOV 3rd. As I said in a previous post, I'm willing to carpool, pick you up, do whatever you need to count your vote in. Once again here's a link to his steeze:  https://www.facebook.com/ChrisforClintonCounty/?fref=ts and http://www.chrisforclintoncounty.com/  so you can get involved, donate, etc...

      Younger people need to take some more interest in what's happening in local politics, band together, and make some progressive changes. It's 2015 and it's about time people, c'mon! In closing I urge you to take a look at the candidates and at the very least go down to vote! Make your voice heard.

     It's so true what they say, "You gotta give it away to keep it." So here's to a brighter future for EVERYONE in this area. Rosenquest is a stepping stone in that direction - Rock on...............................................................................................................................................................


As ALWAYS - thanks for reading!

To my truly awesome and gifted followers  -

Happy Halloween!

 

 

 

     

      

    


        


    

My Thoughts on Suicide / My Experience with Internet Dating / Candidate Chris Rosenquest / Blog Update

     The first part of this blog is a little bit on the sad side... but I think it's important and should be talked about.

..... From time to time I'll occasionally hear of someone I knew, sort of knew, or at the very least acknowledged the existence of, that for some reason or another decided to actively cut their physical life short. More or less a reaction of shock runs though my body and mind upon hearing the news. I ask for as much detail as I can be afforded and then will reminisce on any sort of memorable interaction I've had with them. On the surface it seems quite tragic, hardly understood, and sometimes even cowardly. However, it remains an active part of our human experience and something that is on going. Most people have either been directly affected or at least known someone who has been affected by the act of suicide. This first blog entry concerns my feelings regarding suicide and what my thoughts are on the issue. By suicide I mean purposefully and knowledgably acting in a way that results in the end of your physical existence.
     I used to be scared to death of the idea of suicide, mostly because of the fear of the unknown... There is a ton of momentum and belief in the idea that if someone kills themselves they are automatically going to hell. I don't personally believe that, but I can see why many people do. More or less I figure it goes back to things like religion, whatever upbringing you had, and whatever beliefs you possess. As I get older and learn more about life and the Universe, I'm less and less concerned with the idea that anyone could incur any real danger / suffering simply because they took their own life. There is, in my opinion, a certain degree of sadness and regret I think these poor souls end up with though.
     So far life has shown me to be a very linear and seemingly automatic process - with many hills and valleys and many ups and downs. I don't believe that with all the amazing things going on in this World / Universe humans were only meant to come live one piddly lifetime only to blink out of existence forever. For me - there must be more to it - and if that is true that means there is existence happening outside the physical realm... and if THAT's TRUE then that must mean there is a point / reason for our physical existence - Which brings me to the point that if people act in a way that results in their checking out early, they may actually regret it later on in the afterlife.
     Once these people who kill themselves early realize that life keeps going, and that their existence had meaning (not just meaning but extremely powerful and amazing meaning) they might end up with a real sad regret on their hands. In essence: - Say life is forever - Stretch existence over the course of infinity. Up until this very moment I'm willing to bet most of us had done things we regret, feel bad about, or wish we could have changed, etc.. I feel suicide is basically the same kind of thing - Basically a sad, awful decision we make when we were in a bad part of our lives. Nothing more, nothing less.
     In closing - First I feel it's best to say that I don't believe these poor people who end their lives early are going to hell, or having to face eternity of purgatory, or having to come back as a dog poop, or anything silly like that. I do, however, believe that there should be a very real and active outreach to help these people here on the physical plane - Some people can't help it. I realize there is mental illness, addiction, moments of intense extreme passion... but I ALSO realize it's very possible to live through all of these things and come out to a better place in their lives. To those people who have been through it, I say - Please just try to relax... We're all heading the same direction and whatever way we get to where we're going isn't the point. We'll all meet up in time.
     A far loftier ideal to strive for, I would think, is that we should try to have the best journey / existence we can. For now and forever. We need to lift each other up in times of darkness. Appreciation and Validation for the ones we love and care about, as well as a realization that NOW is forever makes suicide completely unnecessary...................................................................



....... A little over a month ago I decided it might be cool to try out a dating website in effort to meet new and interesting people. Before then I hadn't heard too much about these kinds of sites except for the commercials on TV and the anecdotes of a few people I know personally. After having a full fledged experience with one I feel I can now offer some thoughts about this aspect of social interaction. This is my experience and input on internet dating:
     There are a lot of different options for people who want to try this sort of thing out. Big sites like e harmony and match seemed a little too main stream and serious for me. Although I found it reassuring that these big reputable sites have the largest date and marriage statistics, I also wasn't looking for anything quite that serious at the time. Other sites seem to be more based on what people might have in common - Christianmingle, blackpeoplemeet, pagandating, farmersonly, etc... Then there are ones that seem to just be about flirting and having a good time - zoosk, plentyoffish, etc.. After some careful consideration (and a few drinks to be honest) I decided to try cougarlife.com - a site where older women can hook up with younger men..(or a site where younger men can hook up with older women depending on how you look at it.)
     There is a certain amount of "ok am I really doing this?" I think we have to face when we decide to try online dating. There are a lot of aspects - creating a profile, trying to present yourself, trying not to sound creepy, but trying to plant a few seeds of attraction, etc... It's a whole different thing as opposed to going to the bar and just hooking up with someone.
     I decided on cougarlife for a couple of reasons.. First of all I figured my chances of meeting anyone I already knew was pretty low on that site. Secondly I figure most of the women on that site have kids, which is the level I am on. Thirdly I assume women who are older have a much broader perspective on relationships, they probably have experience and could even give me some fresh perspective on the whole relationship game ...YES I know what some of you are thinking, and I'll admit a fourth reason is that the idea of hooking up with someone significantly more established than me is wicked hot ... haven't u ever seen the Graduate?? and one last reason - most of the girls on that site AREN'T AFRAID of NSA (No Strings Attached) relationships if that's what they're going for. What can I say... Cougars pretty much got it down.
     So I made a profile. I tried to pick a username that would appeal (or attempt to appeal) to the sort of demographic I imagine actively looking for a younger guy who's looking to meet an older woman. I tried to be honest, but vague. I tried to come off as knowledgeable and open to life experience as I could. I threw in a few personal interests coupled with some "dirty fantasy" guff they ask you to describe.  I also wanted to seem light hearted about the whole thing because honestly, If you come off too serious in that kind of environment I think you look needy. I put up a recent picture of me - smiling and trying to look cool / funny, and the waiting game began...
     When you sign up you get an allowance of points and every message you send costs a certain amount - you can "gift" the recipient with an extra special something (like an icon of flowers, high heels, etc.) for some extra points.
     I threw out a few "hey I'm new at this" type messages to some women I thought I could talk to and get the hang of things with.. I threw out some "hey you seem really cool" types / added a spiffy icon (to show her she's worth more points?) to one or two I genuinely admired and could actually see myself being with... and last but not least, of course, a few "hey I'm super sleazy but I know everyone likes sex" types to some just to see if it could get me anywhere. My results were not as spectacular as I thought.
     Almost immediately my inbox started filling up with very generic type profiles all with basically the same message,
      "Hey newbie, I saw your profile and I have to say you're really cute. Click on my link and tell me what you think. c-u-t-e-n-f-o-x-I-x-x-x1-1-9@----- without the spaces ok?"  or
     "Hey! I'm Jessica! Click on my e-mail if you want to see my pics. Let me know what you think ok?.... blah blah e-mail address and obviously a robot..."
      Days later, after looking through dozens of profiles all seemingly located in Montreal, I came to the conclusion that things were a little fishy on this site. I started altering my e-mails:
     "Hey, I think you're really beautiful and you seem really cool! I'd love to hang out sometime. We have a lot in common and I think we could really hit it off : ) Let me know what you think. ..Sorry I have to ask but are you a real person? Please let me know if you're real." lol ... hardly the sort of thing I ever thought I'd have to verify, but just about necessary at this point.
     After a couple of weeks of being on the site I actually realized that some of the profile pictures were starting to become more and more familiar, as well as the messages they would send me. Profiles would be there one day, then "removed" the next.. all the while recycling pictures of god knows who and tailoring their robot profiles to seem more appealing to me...probably based on my internet searches or words I used when I created my own profile... To give you an idea - I would keep getting messages from some extremely hot, yet extremely generic MILF who's profile would read something like:
     "I'm looking for a man who is into expanding their consciousness and can see the big picture in life! I'm a single mom so I need someone stable, preferably with kids. I'm a little on the quiet side but once you get to know me I can't shut up and will most likely bore you to death with trivial knowledge. I'm looking for that someone who's a little off the beaten path, but has sincerity of heart and mind. Someone with clear goals and big dreams. I'm very traditional but for the right guy I'll do just about anything. You know what I mean ; )" - Woah.. Upon first inspection it's like Ummm where the hell have you been all my life?? I mean at that point I don't even really care if she is a robot... Sadly, however, after getting wise to the game that is being played, I decided enough was enough. I gave it a good college try and as much as I looked, there didn't seem to be any honest to goodness actual, real, human beings on that site.
     I'm not sure why they do that, maybe it's just a ploy to hype the site up and generate customers. In the end I decided not to re-enroll and my account will die on Oct 19th. If I have any stalkers out there - you still have a few days to see me on cougarlife. I won't give you my username though - you'll have to work for it if you really want to see it.
     So what have I learned?? Well - I suppose in the end, when it comes to matters of the heart and soul, you just can't "make" it happen. You gotta wait for it. It has to "happen to you." I've heard it many times, from many people of quality character that, "It usually happens when you least expect it." - Trying to make it happen was my mistake. I put myself out there, went in to it with the full intention of starting a new adventure with someone, and came to the sobering conclusion that sometimes your most pronounced action into a valuable endeavor can very easily turn into something unfulfilling.
     I DO, however, feel a very renewed sense of freedom. Not only freedom, but faith in the higher order of things. I feel that maybe - just maybe - Things weren't supposed to happen that way. Life and the Universe must have something different planned for me. Maybe that plan is something a lot better - and I look forward to that with a renewed sense of confidence in the Universe's ability to make (and not make) things happen. I came out unscathed this time...  but boy oh boy, what a trip that was....................................................................




....... I met the Clinton County Legislature Candidate Chris Rosenquest the other day. He actually came to my door while he was walking around my neighborhood giving people information about the election. I talked to him a little bit, he gave me a pamphlet, and I looked it over later on when I had time. Incidentally his opponent Mr. Tahey came by earlier while no one was home and left a pamphlet on my door. After looking over BOTH pamphlets and checking out their websites and whatnot I absolutely believe that Chris Rosenqneust needs to win this next election... Hands down this guy is who we need to help Clinton County get things back on track. I strongly urge all of my friends, enemies, readers, family members, basically anyone who's a registered voter to go out and MAKE their voice heard. We NEED to get this guy in office. Especially to all of my COUNTY friends / Co-workers : THIS guy is the guy who will help make a difference. Clinton County has been an over dried out floppy pancake for too long, run by old bureaucratic farts who don't give a shit about the common people, we need to end this cycle. We need younger blood in office. Rosenquest grew up during the PAFB times and has a sincere desire to restore LIFE again to the county. I talked to him and believe me, from a personal standpoint if I didn't care I wouldn't be writing this right now. If I didn't think he had anything to offer I wouldn't be giving shit one. He does though. He is the key to bringing something new to our lives. This is a SERIOUS issue people, believe me when I say this. Not to get all political or whatever on you but if we want change - NOW is the time to do it and no one else is going to do it for us. Did you know that only 23% of people 18-35 voted in the last election!?! If we get enough of us together we can do some serious damage! For every day you wish things could change, for every time you look around and say this place is sad and just a dead end road, for every time you wish you could live somewhere the action is - just realize that Election Day is on Nov 1st - and we need to rock out. Sincerely - I mean physically go down to the voting booth and say THIS is who I want in office. Rosenquest is someone who deserves the chance to change things. If you don't believe me look into it yourself and I promise you'll end up feeling the same way. I will drive you if you want. I will carpool, I will do just about anything to help bring some hustle back to this County again. In the mean time here is the website where you can volunteer and donate: www.chrisforclintoncounty.com     - I urge you all to get involved, take a stand and embrace the area that is rightfully ours!!   Here is his FB too:        https://www.facebook.com/ChrisforClintonCounty?fref=ts  He is a very cool guy. He's very accessible and willing to talk about the issues we're facing.
      If you're absolutely unable to get involved and make your voice heard - at least do me this favor: Close your eyes every once in a while - when you can - when you have time... just before you're going to sleep at night. Take a few deep breaths and begin to envision Plattsburgh and Clinton County as a rocking and rolling place where business is booming, people are working, kids are partying, money is available, jobs are available, there's always something to do, people are always out, there's something for everyone, everyone you know is happy, County jobs are AMAZING and FUN and SECURE... You can wake up every morning and say YES.. my fuckin' town rocks. I'm proud to be from here and when I look towards the future I can feel good, I know it will never die  - And then associate all of that with the name Chris Rosenquest.. Imagine his name up there - In big letters - imagine people thanking him and giving him high fives and fist pounds. He smiles and takes the podium - For a new town, for a new era. It's certainly about time...............................................................................................................................   




....... Last but not least I would like to let my readers know that I will soon begin to point my thoughts and energy into a more focused point of attraction when it comes to my entries / journals. My "forte", if you will lies primarily in Occult Science and Esoteric studies. From this point on I will make sure that at least one entry out of every blog I write is having to do with such information. I feel now is a good time for this because my higher self is okay with a slow transitioning, I'm not at a point yet where I could realistically piss anyone off energetically, the information is rad and worth reading, and I've built up a small circle of people who are interested in what I have to say / know me by now. Please note that by Occult and Esoteric I mean the following: Theory about the nature of Reality / Universe / Qabalah / Psychic Powers / Astrology / Astral Projection / Meditation / Chakras / On Being a Sensitive / Spell Casting and Reality Shifting / .... and things of that nature. I don't claim to be an expert, but I do claim to speak from someone who has devoted a lot of time and practice into these sorts of things.
     In conclusion I wish to say I hope I have provided some entertainment and maybe even a few laughs thus far. I hope my current readers have gotten to know me a little and understand what kind of person I am. From here on out at least 1/3rd of my writing will be based on the supernatural and Occult. I wish you all the best. Keep reading and I look forward to writing you all in the future!................................................


Much abundance - Love you all!